New Siblings Gifts

Maternity ward: 'Oh boy - stereo!'

'Tommy and Billy have been inseparable since birth. You don't always find that in a placenta.'

"Mum, are we keeping all of them?"

At the Museum

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

Boy and Bear and Monster

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

Child driving a toy car

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

Children's Dreams on Christmas Eve

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

"I don't care if you saw this in a western..."

"Send ME to bed early, will they?"

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

Magnet School. A "magnet school"? Won't that mess up the computers?

'I've been told before that I'm very mature for a three year old.'

'Oh, nothing, just babysitting the Lord of the Rings.'

"Better luck next time, kid."

Snowman

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

I think you meant to huff 'n' puff at the next house over.

'The cow jumped over the Moon? -- What was SHE on?'

The Charge of the Kids

Groovy Baby

6th Grade Do-You-Own Research Fair

A balloon vendor hands a child his only 'good' face out of many,less than desireable faces.

Fade to black...

"I don't get it either, but my mom keeps telling me to hang up the phone, so I do it to make her happy."

"Mom, when the baby's born, can I have the bubble wrap it's shipped in?"