New Property Acquisition T-Shirts

'I'm sorry, miss. We are planting a forest here, so you'll have to move.'

"What's wrong with swallowing up other companies?"

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

"You called me, boss?" "Yes, I overheard you talking to patrons about all the new planets we’ve found." "I want you to stop doing that." "At least until I’m done buying up as much of that real estate as I can. I don’t need any competitors driving up the prices." "Very bad man." "When the hipsters run out of cities to gentrify here, my properties on Gliese 581c are going to make a killing."

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

'Unforeseeable future site of Hainesmore Industries.'

"Oh, no! We've inadvertently gobbled up our own parent company."

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"We balanced our budget this month!"

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"It's strictly business. Please don't take your financial ruin personally."

'There's a gentleman out here with $643 million. He would like to discuss a takeover.'

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

'Could you be more specific than a king's ransom or an arm and a leg.'

No - None sense, take-charge, inc. - Formerly: Happy-go-lucky, inc.'

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

"I've just bought five acres of prime oceanfront. Want to help me build on it?"

'It's only four acres but we're glad we bought it - he's always wanted to be an expert in his own field.'

'I'll say this for you young Thoreu - he certainly does make good use of his pond.'

"Someday, son, all this will be yours. It'll be under water, but still ..."

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'Cards for all occasions: takeover, buyouts, mergers, flotation, bankruptcy.'

Predator, Inc bought Prey, Ltd

'And the funniest part is I made Frank go out and buy a new, $5,000 fridge, just to hold a $4.00 bottle of wine!'

"Gentleman, come in! Come in! Let me take your company."

'Should our firms merge, which one will be the girl?'

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."