New Phone Gifts

'Well, your cell phone is clean now.'

'OMG!'

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

'Nothing beats seeing your favourite band play live.'

"Lucky, I Said Heel!"

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

Likes: $2.

Elfie Stick

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

"Would you relax? They never look up."

Text Culture

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

Klimt Kiss Phones

No caption. (On a pirate ship various flags fly, including flags with a skull and crossbones and other banners showing logos from various social media sites. On the boat deck below, a pirate is looking at his cell phone).

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

Cellphone Islands

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

Dawing your Cellphone

Screen Time vs Book Time

Giraffe Selfie

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

"Textin’"

City Marathon.

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

The Modern Novel.

"No, it's not a bug. Since you keep losing you phone, I purchased you a phone-locating drone."

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'