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"They say this is the 'new normal.' What's 'normal'?"

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

'I love our hideaway. I only wish we could find it.'

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

"Oh, Mrs. Horris, he just said his first words..!"

"Yes, Jane Lyons, sitting next to Katy Jones, class of 2018, it is important for a writer to know her audience."

'You change him, and I'll change the tire.'

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

Impracticle Guide to Having Babies

"I'm sure he said to meet him near the cactus."

Fishing direction sign.

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

"Who should we have at eye level this month?"

'This is Tyler; he's mommy's precious little feral-angel.'

'Listen up troop. We're going on a treasure hunt.'

I can hear growling, but I can't see the bear.

You Are Here...Your Nearest Wi-FI Signal Is Here.

'So much for your internal compass.'

"And up ahead is a place called, 'portage'."

Canadian Canoe.

'You can go home today, but we'd like to run a few more tests on your husband.'

'In my experience, life is good most of the time, but come the holidays, they look at me as if I'm a nuisance...'

Meet the Shameless Self-Promoter 2 PM

'Frank, I think it's about time you bought another pair of boots.'

Women who Read Too Much

'I didn't get the Owners Manual. I thought you got the Owners Manual.'

'Oh, relax. Stopping to ask how to use the GPS does not violate the male decree against asking directions.'

"You might have time left for one more book, but only if it doesn't require and lot of research."

"I didn't know it was poison ivy. It didn't have any warning labels."

Books 'n' Carrots