New Home In The Countryside Gifts

Rooster

'Life is great' down on the farm.

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

Allotment

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

Country Bumpkin.

'It's 'baa baa' here and 'baa baa' there, until I'm just about nuts.'

'How very Cumbria.'

"Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!"

"I always forget how much louder they sound in the country."

Walkers

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

"It's God's country, if your god wears camouflage and dips tobacco."

'I want to immortalise the area in a painting before it is changes for ever.' (Artist is scooped up by a digger.)

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

Thatched roof car.

Sheep In Curlers

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

A Day in the Country.

Migrating cows.

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

"We should get out to the country more often."

Holiday cottage

"See, dear, it's only an owl hooting...."

Summer in Elysium and The long vacation in Arcadia

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

"So why do I feel like we're being watched?"

That private little woodland walk you used to love now with a: Visitors' Experience Centre!

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

Tree Squirrel

"Today on Escape to the Country Emily & Oliver are looking for that special little property in the Cotswolds. So what exactly's going to tick all their boxes?"

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

A Gated Community.

'...and then I married the handsome farmer and the two hundred head of dairy cattle.'

"Today we can help herd cattle, go on a nature hike, get a sauna and massage, or go into town and rob the bank."