New Furniture Purchase Pillows

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

Interior design trends for parents....

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"Something went wrong after you inserted tab A into slot B."

"Surprise!"

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

Fittd shēt

The Lion, the witch and the flat-pack self-assembly wardrobe: lion and witch putting a wardrobe together.

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"This new chair has the smoothest 360 swivel action on the market!"

"The knights of the round accent table"

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

'I had no idea Ikea had been around so long.'

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

"OK, last time: Cado teak lounge chair from Denmark – me. Doggy bed – you."

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

'Adam and Eve in the garden of Sweden'

Lay-Z-Family Recliner

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

'I'd like to match this credenza.'

"If it's got my ass on it, it's befitting of royalty."

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

"We balanced our budget this month!"

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

Bird collecting furniture for it's home.

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

"Attention, everyone! I'd like to introduce the newest member of our family."

'Make up your mind, folks... King size or Queen size?'

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

'We've moved some fussy people, but she tops it!'