New Dating Journey Mugs

"Do you have any of those books that understand men?"

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

"Two, please—one senior and one tootsie."

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

Tasty.

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

'Crabs, sharks, octopi...'

"Don't make eye contact. Don't make eye contact. Don't...."

"On the internet nobody knows you're a dog, but in person..."

"To meet the girl of your dreams, swipe right on the lamp."

'Don't be too sad. Sure, she was special, but there are plenty more fish in the sea.'

"Height is the only thing I'm capable of changing about myself."

Quarandating.

'Hey! That's some facial cover-up job!'

Women Seeking Men

You have: 2,010,597 matches

'You asked her to go out with you?', 'Yes, but she says there's a lengthy approval process.'

"He's your type--gorgeous, successful, and totally unavailable."

'Nah! He's not my type.'

'Yes, this is my first time at speed dating. Is it that obvious?'

'Get lost. Can't you see I'm with someone?'

"I have two children from a previous economic cycle."

"My mates at the showroom said that I should start dating again."

Dorothy and the singles bar

"Having a dog is great for meeting more dogs."

'I keep looking for a keepr, and all I find are fixer-uppers.'

"Not on a first date! That's fine by me, I've been on lots of dates."

'Same old line - his smartphone doesn't understand him.'

"I didn't put this in my personal ad, but I'm synonymous with Belgian cuisine."

"Careful Nora. There's nothing worse than a bad oyster!"

"In a world of beefcake, I'm dating tofu."