New Babysitting Job Gifts

Today's Babysitter

City Zoo: Day Care

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

The Baby Walker

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

"Look Mommy, hat!"

'The child is very illogical'

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

'Still having a hard time finding day care?'

"I'm beginning to regret taking this job at the local playgroup."

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

Baby knocks old lady out with pram toy.

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

Coping with a strong-willed child

"I'm bored."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"Oh, Mrs. Horris, he just said his first words..!"

"Whoa. Someone needs their diaper changed."

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

'I think I'll take her to the zoo today.'

Rockabye Baby- $10/hour.

"No es problema para mi si no es problema para ti."

Water the hydrangeas twice a week and trim as needed. The bromeliad only needs to be high-fived on Saturday, but you can give it high and low fives anytime you have a spare moment. Just, whatever you do, don't give it a "too slow" or it will turn inward and begin shutting down.

"Sorry, that was just the wet diaper talking."

Baby Hairstyles.

'Doorbell. Must be the sitter.'

'So far I've found out the doctor had something to do with it.'

A baby playing on a grand piano

Changing the baby.

"I never subscribed to Hobbes' state of nature theory until the night we left the kids without a sitter."

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...