Nervous Newbies Gifts

'First day on the job is always exciting. I can tell you're just itching to get started.'

"Same here. It's my first time too."

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

"That was too many fresh original voices for one night."

'Be gentle with me, it's my first novel.'

'It's a screaming ladies part.'

"Triple whammy."

Impractical Guide to Having Babies

'Sorry, Holly!'

"Alice, please! You're a practice teacher! At some point I have to leave you alone with them!"

"Tomorrow we go back to the hospital and replace him with a quieter model!"

"I just remembered... I forgot to turn off the sink."

'Would you mind holding my hand Jim? The truth is, I'm deathly afraid of flying.'

Product Recall (aeroplane)

'Your first trial?'

"Of course he's not our son. You wanted me to change the baby, didn't you?"

'Doesn't give us much to look forward to, does it?'

'How's it going?!'

"Dude...Smiley wants to meet me for a burger...maybe it means she's hungry."

"So we're cool? We can go on a date?"

Excess Baggage: The conception of electronic ticketing still has a few airline passengers spooked.

"You may well have been here first but it doesn't work like that."

'I don't think he is a confident flyer.'

'If you're teaching him how to drive, what are you doing back there?'

"There's that funny squealing again - I think it's coming from your side."

"I've driven cross country with my wife, three kids and a dog. I know what a hard drive is."

Meet Jim, you've a lot in common...he's an insufferable bore as well...

'I think I'm going to throw up.'

'He must be so excited - Today is his very first day at school!'

'Sorry I didn't do better in computer science. My teacher wanted to send you my report card over the Internet, but I told her you think computers are a fad.'