Nervous Graduate Gifts

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

'I have this fear of the real world...'

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

"O.K., time's up. Pencils down."

"How sweet, your hand is trembling."

'I wasted a lot of time in graduate school to get this job.'

"Now remember, if I jump out the window, I want to leave."

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

Day one, post grad

"The problem with online schooling is I can't get help from Mom and Dad!"

'Be gentle with me, it's my first novel.'

'Unfortunately our definition of 'job' differs.'

Graduate

'We sell gifts for people to give to graduates they know.'

'Your first trial?'

'Do you have one called Job?'

'She will not call on me, she will not call on me, she. . .'

Fresh out of school, new hire Justin Huffenberger is temporarily stunned and disoriented by the light at the end of the university tunnel.

'I'm now ready to make my own way in the world. But first, can you guys loan me 200 grand to pay off my student loan?'

"Same here. It's my first time too."

"I figure that by the time I’m 62, I’ll have no student-loan debt, then, who knows – maybe start a family."

"Is that Baldo's 'scary Halloween' face?"

Grabbed By Gorilla

"There's that funny squealing again - I think it's coming from your side."

'Bob smiled awkwardly'

'He must be so excited - Today is his very first day at school!'

"What did you say? Fine? Five? File? Oh...FIRE!!"

Learner Drivers

"I was finally able to capture all my angst in writing. Then it became a required college textbook. Now, I have brand new angst."CS561041

'Your first interview, Mr Jason?'

'First day on the job is always exciting. I can tell you're just itching to get started.'

'I was wrong. I didn't think Gibson would make much use of his diploma.'

"On your mark, get set. . . Start School!!!"