Neighbor Diplomat T-Shirts

'I think you got the drummer - Now try for the trumpet player!'

"Hey! Turn down your damn white-noise machine!"

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

...And he calls himself the 'Green' Giant...

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

"First time pruning?"

"See? And you said you couldn't work from home."

'Why can't my walks be that fun?'

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

Israel/Palestine Conflict

"We thought we would come somewhere remote to self-isolate."

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

Canape?

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

Neighbor Leaf Wars

"He loves his leaf blower."

"This happens everytime someone asks to speak to the head of the household."

Every so often, Madeline gets carried away.

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

"Has the Wi-Fi seemed slow to you lately?"

Thank you bubbles

Annoying neighbours - irritating wind chimes

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

'He has a big heart. . . inviting his homeless friends in to stay dry.'

"If you ask me, that sky looks awfully threatening!"