Door-to-door Diplomat T-Shirts

Welcome to our world. Please leave yours at the door.

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

"I need to see your budget proposal."

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

Inclusive speech

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

'I am willing to concede that the company has been underperforming of late...'

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

"That's the last time I'm going to allow politics to be discussed in the office."

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

"It looks like the 'because I say so' has it."

Career Choices

'Here's another one that'll make you blow your stack.'

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

'Would you be interested in attending a stress management seminar?'

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

HR - Helping Relationships

"How come you always take Amnesty International's side?"

'You lack the expertise we're looking for, Mr Wheaton - but darn it, I like your attitude.'

"If I can't get a firm decision, I'd accept a wobbly acquiescence."

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

Office meeting

"When I said to convince him of the need for change I was hoping you'd use the seductive power of reason and logic."

'So, now we have ascertained who is responsible...'

"Remember, if I can't introduce you it's because I can't remember their name - so that's when you step in and introudce yourself so we can get them to say it, okay?" - Company Party Prep.

'I hate his kind. They use their integrity and hard work to advance their careers.'