Needle Navigators Pillows

"I've been sitting on pins and needles...ever since my wife started sewing!"

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

'What do you mean I don't take time to smell the flowers?'

One way only.

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

'By the way, dear - you have an appointment with the acupuncturist tomorrow.'

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

Books 'n' Carrots

Number Phobia.

'Niche apres tenure. Niche before and you're toast.'

My boat

"I assumed it was writer's block but as I've never written anything I could be wrong."

'If that doesn't work, nothing will.'

'It didn't hurt at all. You gave it to my teddy bear.'

'Just a minute, I forgot something.'

Niche Marketing

"The doctor will give you your shot. I'm just going to referee."

"Uh oh. It's the kids...and they're flying back!"

'Once he stopped sticking me with needles, I felt great!'

"He's in a critical condition"

"I know you're just trying to be helpful, but why don't you let me decide where my acupuncture needles should go?"

Parents sleeping on big pile of nappies while baby sleeps in bed

'Tell me. How many acupuncture treatments did doctor Wing give you?'

"Okay, so I've outgrown my niche in Organizational Behavior. I'll re-niche."

'That is one absorbent nappy.'

'Could you turn me around the other way?'

"Just one more..."

Nurse sharpening a needle before an injection.

"See, I told you it would hurt me as much as it would hurt you."

'Please Miss, I know what comes before 8. My school bus!'