Navigating Open Marriages Pillows

"But, Dave. You knew when you married me that I clowned around."

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

What an afternoon. Rudy, listen to me. It didn't mean anything. You can't play Xbox 360 all afternoon with a guy and pretend it means nothing. I was drunk! You loved it - all of it. The racing and arcade games, the first-person shooters, but especially ... No ... WWF Wrestling Smackdown. I'm a married woman!

"After six marriages I learnt my lesson and married my divorce lawyer."

"Do you...enter name...take...enter name...to be your...choose one from the pull down menu...click the I do icon now please."

Cricketer goes for marriage guidance

"Morning, Brad." "Morning, Angelina."

'He's not the man I married. In fact, none of them are.'

"He's a terrific photographer but weddings are not his specialty."

KEEP YOUR FRIENDS CLOSE AND YOUR ENEMIES CLOSER, 'That kind of thinking leads to marriage.'

My wife is the inspiration behind the light speed spaceship - the longer I'm married, the more I want to be the first human who lives on Mars.

"And this is my significant mother."

We should talk...

"It's time to bring in the wax begonias and your mother."

'Last week I got a lovely watch for my wife!'

Cyber Fight

Sadie, we need to see a couple's counselor. Yuck. No way! I won't spend a bunch of dough to have some halfwit tell me how to live my life! But I found an inexpensive counselor who will just listen to us talk through our issues. Counseling $10. This end up.

'Everyone does divorces, Mrs.Dawson.'

"Steve and I live together, but we're getting indicted separately."

'Happy anniversary! It's a season pass for us to go to marriage counseling.'

"You have superior extra ocular muscle strength - how often do you roll your eyes at your husband?"

"Honey, wake up! I just remembered something you did that annoyed the hell out of me!"

"This is one of those things you should share before marriage."

'Jeremy, why can't we talk instead of you bottling things up all the time?'

'How was I to know that you don't like Marzipan?'

'Inform him I dislike it when he uses the dog to communicate.'

"I just thought maybe we should consider letting ourselves go now instead of waiting a few years into our marriage."

'And do you, Rob, promise to love and cherish Simone, even if she earns more than you do?'

'Our marriage is like a one-way street, and I'm behind him, honking my horn...'

"We have had a great year but we've also raised the bar for next year."

"When we have fun, we really have fun."

"Are you trying to tell me something, dearest?"

'It's another special interest call senator - your wife!'

"I do too spark joy!"

Your Uncle Mort and Sadie are back from Canada. Are they still getting married? Yeah, but they're slowing things down. They're going to talk to someone about their problems. A counselor is always a good idea. They couldn't exactly afford a professional. He doesn't put the bathroom seat down.