Nature Satirist Gifts

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

'You must admit that, ideologically, we are in opposite Poles.'

"Trust me, she's had work done."

Cheese Trap

"Hide? What do you mean hide? We are literally camouflage and they still eat us!"

Mouse escaping a cat.

"It's a bird feeder to attract birds of prey."

Missing the Obvious.

'Human beings get all the breaks -- just TRY to get Medicare to pay for a tree surgeon!'

'Wow! I just bagged my first trophy big horn sheep.'

Glimpses One Dollar

'It's not as easy as you think - saddle sores, bursitis in the shoulder, pigeons...'

Hey, I think I'm going to like global warming.

Fake trophy moose photo.

"Why don't we call it a draw?"

"Okay, but irony aside, what happens once we get into their den?"

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

'Go on, Andy, it's high time anteaters learned size isn't everything!'

'I couldn't think of a science fair project so I just re-invented the wheel.'

"Up here, light is neither a particle nor a wave. It's a liquid."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

'To help save the environment, I've replaced all of our lightbulbs with compact fluorescents. Now I'm running the old ones over to the landfill...'

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

'That's one hell of a cat-flap Harry. You must have a big cat, heh, heh.'

Try me/try me/try me...

Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!

"Get out of my face!"

'Still think nuclear testing is harmless?'

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

"Jeepers, I didn't know anything could gets so hot!"

"This may surprise some of your viewers, but I didn't actually want to go into the box."