Nature's Apprentice Gifts

'When you invented vegetables, Sir, did you know that my mother would be able to fit them all into one garden?'

'Winter days not nice enough for gardening.'

"Well, that's created a little order in a world of chaos."

"First time pruning?"

'I think I'll take her to the zoo today.'

Please buzz off. That's my flower!

"There are the arts, the sciences, agriculture, and commerce. Stick with commerce, if you know what's good for you."

"How do I know this isn't a performance art piece?"

Medicinal plants

"For my next trick, I'll need a volunteer, a fake knife, and a mirrored box with a secret compartment."

'She's still a novice yet.'

"I'm surprised, Caswell. I thought you were a happy camper."

'I've been told I have Rembrandt's golden glow.'

"Geese fly in a V, son--attorneys fly in a wedge."

Head full of Books.

'I mind my mother, and I do my lessons, and I'm here for the quid pro quo.'

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

"Hold still, it's a programme about making your own tv cabinet."

'Alex we talked about this, you can't bring live things home from the lake. . . no buts, they don't want to leave the lake. Let your little friends go.'

"I packed the cooking gear like you told me, Dad...where do I plug it in?"

School of hard knocks: Mail box 'Knock-knock jokes'

'All that we learn from history is that we don't learn from history...'

"How'd you know I was from New York?"

'Let's face it,Edgar.you and mother nature don't have anything in common.'

"Let me quote a few home truths to you."

"Great act - but let's see how he does on the written test."

'I'm getting tired, Robin. Why don't we teach the poor to steal for themselves?'

The Traditional Board Game Company

"Hare the ignorance. Love the ignoramus."

'It's a lot of work building a giant snowman, but we'll appreciate it in July!'

"Yes, but it's naturally toxic."

The training halo...