Nature Comic Gifts

'My doctor told me that I need to slow down. But I don't think I can.'

'. . . And for all you vegetarians out there the Venus Flytrap.'

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

'I'll be honest with you. The pay isn't great.'

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

Penguin

"Peach fuzz. How does a nectarine know when it reaches puberty?"

Just a little seasoning...

Man lets his pigeons out to be fed in the park.

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

"I'm a monster."

"I see you have extensive wood chuckery experience."

Sawfish cuts through the oars of row boat.

"I've been at loose ends lately."

Cat Lover's Leap.

Alligator Bars

'Sorry Bruce, but we have to stop seeing each other: I've changed, you have to understand...'

"I got you some flowers..watered them, too.".

"Are you kids going to behave, or do I have to put my foot down?!"

Evolution...the booted flamingo.

"It all comes down to the aging and fermentation process."

'We're all experts in one thing or another. For instance, I consider myself something of a specialist in fluid dynamics...'

"Have you noticed Carl never leaves the field to go to the bathroom?"

Deer crossing the road on a Skidoo.

'Steroids.'

"This heat transfer dance had better work. I'm freezing my tail off!"

Horse rides over a judge.

Crossing Guard to rabbit at Deer Crossing: 'Not so fast, buddy - you don't look like a deer to me!'

"It doesn't make me feel sexy, it makes me cross-eyed!"

"Remember last October when you had on your autumn colors and we were hugging like this? And that tiny chipmunk jumped on my face? That was nuts!"

"I touched another squirrel's nuts. Any other questions?"