Natural Resource Manager Gifts

"Isn't this great Darling: I've been invited to be a guest speaker at this year's "Sustainable Logging" convention..."

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

Scarcity

Servant brings king skateboard on pillow.

'The good news is we've discovered a vast new oil resource. The bad news is we need a space ship to get there.'

Population rocket

Blowing dust off an order book.

"Well, I've finished the project on time and on budget!" "That means I've given you too much time and too much money!"

In the future, wars will be fought over water.

'Look on the bright side: now we qualify for an energy-conservation award.'

BMA criticises 'Black Hole' of NHS IT spending

"There is a great deal of evidence that big savings can be made if departments shared resources... But I suspect that implementing the changes might be problematic if we can't even get Norman to lend out his pencil sharpener."

Snorkeling: A Dollar A Minute

Wolf Reintroduction.

"I ventured into a garden this morning and was caught by a snake catcher, then relocated here. Where am I? Can you help me find my family again?"

How judicious you are/How thin you spread it

Biblical Procurement Tales: Project Ark.

Mankind loves Earth

Valuable Water

'Managing finance is integral to this post. How would you respond to a perfectly reasonable request for extra funds?'

'Mind you, I'm not responsible for the entire pipeline ?' just the section that flows through my office.'

"Our team needs a lot of nurturing."

Blood is thicker than water. Oil is thicker yet.

Wildlife Management.

"I think someone's been overfeeding The sacred Cow lately."

Earth's energy

"Go forth and multiply under the constraint of sustainability within Nature's framework? What the heck is THAT supposed to mean?"

A=Gets the job done (efficient) B=Wasteful if spent (flashy) Available resources

"Maybe some of us don't want to give ourselves a round of applause for agreeing to restore the delicate balance of our ecosystem."

"I knew the woodpeckers were a mistake."

'Looks like you're having a pretty good season, eh Ben?'

"Hey, who died and gave you the right to determine my water rights?"

'I got the idea from the parks department.'

'I don't know -- maybe we should check the fuse box.'

'I'm glad I'm not a quango.'