Natural Birth Enthusiasts Pillows

"...We said a natural birth, not a naturist birth!"

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'No. no. When your wife asked you to change the baby, she meant the diaper.'

"Is she breastfeeding in public?! That's disgusting!"

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'Boy, if you'd just stop roaming around, it would be easier to find you...'

I'm accused of kicking you in the womb, but your evidence is purely circumstantial. Lawyer baby.

Whoa

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

'Hey, big deal! We're all new kids on the block!'

Maternity Ward

"I wish they'd never discovered fertility drugs!"

'How many fingers do you see?'

'BEEP! BEEP! Pregnant Lady Reversing!...'

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

Uterus: One size fits all.

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"

Bouncing baby

In the club.

Giving Birth

Maternity Hospital

'We got Spot and Fluffy when it rained cats and dogs. You came in a baby shower.'