National Security Adviser Pillows

"National security adviser"

"Now lets hear you say: 'We have bigger nukes than your nukes, nyaa, nyaa.'"

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

Public Relations: Reputations cleaned and repaired

SAGE mentality

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

Rock and a Hard Place

The Jose Padilla Experience

'Yes, it's a stupid speech, Senator, but you've got to court the stupid VOTE.'

Vladimir Putin Pulling Trump Across The Table By His Tie

Death to the Extremists

Thin Tank and Emote Tank.

"Rudy has asked me to apologize, on his behalf, for your being offended..."

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

Legalish

"Our intelligencia said we will be outnumbered 100 to one, but that we can hope it's only fake news."

"Our intelligence shows that everybody loves us."

"Do you take dark money?"

Automatic Congressman

'I've changed my mind...I want to grow up to be a politician.'

"Mr. President-elect, the NSA is ready for your directives on who to spy on and how much."

"Sir, your new campaign manager is here."

Official Rhetoric About Leakers and Whistleblowers, Translated

Half a house is better than none.

'I know zero about the issue, so I can't be called a 'Washington insider'.'

"Our rule of thumb is: 'Keep it complicated' - so no one will understand how we choose a candidate."

"Some of it is soft and some of it is hard, but the main thing is that all of it is money."

'Taking bribes is understandable, Senator, but you really shouldn't keep billing records.'

The Election Strategy

"I always forget. Is this the day we spin ahead one hour?"

"Constant delays and confusion over Brexit are causing the firm huge problems. . ."

I voted.

"Don't forget - I was manipulating the will of the people before manipulating the will of the people was cool."

"Hello there...! I'm your hardworking GOP Congressional Representative. I'm running for re-election and I would appreciate your support..."