Narwhal Enthusiast Gifts

Narwhals...the lying b****rds of the Arctic.

Ned's inflatable raft service was unable to stay afloat, and ended up going under.

Carefree luggage.

The experienced backpacker.

Squirrels Stockpiling Mulling Spices for Winter

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

Beach con-man.

"It's not the persistent lack of sunlight or freezing temperatures that bother me - it's the crowds I can't stand."

Bite out of fishing pier.

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

'Don't ask me why but he feels a great deal of pride in calling it his 'man-cave'.'

"Eat me"

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

'I'm sending another scam email requesting money to help free Willy...'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

'Heavy seas tonight, Mom...'

Man Dreaming Of Australia.

"I was drawing a whale, but I ran out of paper."

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

Captain steering house through flood.

'Hey, Charlie, have we got good news for you!'

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

"It's a new year, and I have a brand new attitude. Which way is it to San Diego Sea World?"