Whale Aficionado Gifts

Ahab's whale-proof hat.

"What's remarkable is that just last week he was lying despondent on the beach."

Why whales aren't kept as pets: 'Plankton prices sky-rocket.'

'Not whale stew again.'

'Hey, Charlie, have we got good news for you!'

'I don't think there IS such a thing as low-fat whales.'

Whale Romance

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

'I'm sending another scam email requesting money to help free Willy...'

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

"It's a new year, and I have a brand new attitude. Which way is it to San Diego Sea World?"

Sperm Whale.

Ishmael's First Day on the Pequod was Full of Surprises: "A harpoon!? Don't you practice catch and release?"

"See what happens when you go swimming after eating!"

"Ever get the feeling you're being watched?"

Japanese Whaling

"I'd like to have my teeth scrimshawed without being, you know, harpooned."

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

'But you're an admiral. How can you feel seasick on a waterbed?'

Watching Sea Life.

'Say, are you in the mood for a Spielberg?'

Tunnel of Whale Guts

"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."

"Now you're just being a jerk!"

'Don't you think they'd be better off in the water?'

'I win!'

Shark food pyramid.

"They don't look like an endangered species."

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't east so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much flotsam.'

"I've been at loose ends lately."

'It's grossed over a billion dollars. Let's go see the Titanic wreck.'