Narratives Gifts

"The problem is there's no engine. Just a mysterious plot device."

"The key to a good story is to give the protagonist lots of challenges."

"Dad, can we have a bedtime narrative?"

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

"Dad, please tell me again about that mass production and consumerism."

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

Characters jumping out of a book.

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

'I'm not being punished! I'm reading because I happen to enjoy reading!'

Grimm's Reality Tales.

"We've done a rigorous examination of your business plan using the latest algorithms to model future profits. . . which way up would you like it?"

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

". . . I called this meeting to communicate that I had dinner Noah..."

The writers group met every Tuesday for support and fellowship.

"That was too many fresh original voices for one night."

It's an autobiography of a guy who spent his whole life trying to get his first @#^& book published. Editor.

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

"I feel that I have at least one more unpublished novel in me."

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

'Is this your first book launch?'

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

Thomas Keneally

"It all happened so fast. 'Notable Book of the Year' to the remainder shelves to HERE in just six months!"

Writer Services: We fix plot holes.

"...And I like how you switched from the first person narrative to third person—impressive." "Thanks."

This new writer we've got is really working out, dear. I feel reinvigorated! Like someone's breathed new life into me! Why, I feel like anything can happen now! Like we can do things that are out of the ordinary! things we almost never do. I said Not tonight, dear.

"Excuse me, Jerrod, but I'm leaving you for Paul's competing narrative."

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

"But you didn't say they had to make sense - you just told us to write a thousand words a day."

"It was only when I started to write the story of my life that I realised I'd forgotten to have one."

"I wrote, self-published and remaindered it myself."

The central metaphor of her novel was a fly.

"See, that's the problem with you new breed. You take rejection too personally."