Nagging Ninja Pillows

"You used to have a funny little laugh, Marshall. What happened to your funny little laugh."

Domestic Superheroes!!

Self help acupuncture

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Tool Box

'It was bound to happen - they're beginning to think like binary computers.'

"Can we please just stick to the core business?"

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

'On the plus side we've saved money by getting all the numbers on one graph.'

ACME Balloon Company.

'Simply put.'

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

"We value your input, but all your suggestions involve more play-time, naps and treats."

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

"You'll feel a pinch now and another one when the bill comes."

'If 'x' is unknown, why should I rock the boat?'

Coronavirus world

"I hate negative numbers, and I'll stop at nothing to avoid them."

"Do you have any knitting patterns for somebody who can only count to five?"

Best Seller

'Yeah, I don't have trouble remembering my times tables, but I stink at algebra...'

Gone Bookkeepin'

'This would be a lot easier, Ms. Sims, if there were a little more margin for error.'

'It won't do you any good! You can't run from your math problems!'

"Dad, wouldn't my allowance be better off earning interest in a tax free municipal bond fund?"

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

'I tried everything to turn this around but if the cops ask, I was here in this room with you guys all week.'

'Race you to the nearest lap?'

I've found a loophole in your loophole

"That's more like it Perkins..!!"

"The air bag sensed he was going to sleep. I love technology."

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

Everything You Wanted to Know About Stats ...

"Make it Dow 30,000, and I'll sell you my soul."