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"It being Saturday night, the gods have asked for pizza."

"Sorry sir - our sun screen only goes up to Factor - 100..."

Loch Ness

"Sure, but Mrs. Noah did make some design changes while you were out collecting beasties."

"Let's see. . . this one is a sioux arrow. . . This one is an Apache arrow. . . Holy smoke!! Tex, number three is lie-threatening!! That's a cupid arrow!"

"Not now, I've a shocking toothache."

'It's a peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich.'

Demonization: Fifth Horseman of the Apocalypse.

The Devil's Larder

'I'll be back later -- don't let Cain and Abel run around barefoot.'

'One kiss will turn me into a prince. But you won't like the stretch marks.'

Horror Movies in Hell.

"I'm not touching it if it's not organic!"

"Straight on - you'll recognise it when we get there."

Goliath's Widow.

Noah Mishears God's Instruction...

"There's been a mistake. The NSA cleared me!"

A Vision Had by Charlemagne (Legend of Croquemitaine).

"I don't know how to say this but I've found someone else."

"Can't you do anything about this sunlight?"

"I say, Sir Reginald, have you noticed anything peculiar about this voyage?"

I sometimes feel spotted, but I never really feel seen.

"Hey, do you mind getting that?"

Shepherd and eurydice

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

Tut and Carmen.

Couple looking at the statue of Eros by moonlight.

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

Venus

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

Toadstools

Vlad the Impala

"Will you have a Sphinx?"