Mythical Strategist Gifts

" - This might work, but management will never approve it . . ."

Trojan Horse Threat.

"Any questions?"

"Delegating authority is good. Delegating blame is better."

"We offer a generous flex time policy - you can work your 90 hours per week any way you'd like."

Trojan Hurdler.

'Did you clear this through Legal first?'

The Reason Ed isn't mentioned in the bible.

"Staring down the enemy in the heat of battle! That is how sausage is made!"

"He was furiously reading the Bible before he died." "Looking for loopholes."

"But will it distract the public's attention enough that they mindlessly buy our products?"

'I knew this was a bad place to work when I saw that they call the company handbook 'the Owner's Manual.''

Sisyphus visits Stowe

"The economy's been worsening for a while, but people still don't feel it, Rudy." "...Which means we still have time to get in on the despair action." "Despair action"? "We're going to expand our menu. Add more comfort foods, more 'sale' items, debt consolidation loans..." "Nobody's dumb enough to get a debt consolidation loan from some random guy." "Ha ha hoo hoo hee-"

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

Sisyphus and coronavirus

'The bad news is that our company is bankrupt. The good news is that we're only morally bankrupt.'

"I'm not only a Guardian Angel, I'm also an expert at turnarounds."

"Try unplugging it and throwing it out the window."

"The moon, the dinner, dancing. How could this night be more perfect?"

"Rapunzel,Rapunzel.Throw down your accounts for the last fiscal year!"

'You're my economic advisor. What'll I do?'

'Yes, it's easy to make a mistake in a conduct dismissal, Bob. But as mistakes go this is a big one.'

"Phizby, your can't do attitude has really cut down on screw-ups around here. Keep up the good work!"

"Because of the economic situation they've relaxed the rules."

'I know you don't belong here, but if we let you go to Heaven, we couldn't not guarantee your safety.'

Priest with the Pet Devil.

"The figures for the last quarter are in. We made significant gains in the fifteen-to-twenty-six-year-old age group, but we lost our immortal souls."

'What do you mean you can't find the key?'

"I guess the point I'm trying to make is, calling the committee on Progress and Evolution a bunch of know-it-all nincompoops might have felt good when you said it, but..."

Targets

'I've decided to make you someone else's problem.'

Wall St Baptist: 'Life is exactly like the stock market exchange and we each have our own portfolio to manage.'

'You should have thought about your allergies before you built the ark.'