Mythical Masterminds Pillows

'I bet your grandad made a bomb out of the tooth fairy!'

Small child building a large contraption from junk

"Do you think Trump has read 'Contemporary Relativism and the Death of Meaning'?"

'Whomever pulls the sword from the stone will lead this project.'

Computer operator welding machine.

'I think I found the problem.'

Children Teaching Adults to Use Computers

Mad Cyclist Disease, the latest problem to plague cyclists.

The World's Most Evil Mastermind (and a man sitting in a chair).

The original sundial.

John von Neumann, after completing his book. 'Theory of Self-Replicating Automata'.

'Off hand, I'd say it's a problem with your distributor.'

Change of Management - Fortunes Told

'The curious incident of the dig in the night-gown.'

Do you remember when all we had to worry about was the patients?

the company is cutting back our team's training budget.'

"I told you streaking at Wimbledon was a terrible idea!"

'You'll be having extensive dental surgery...'

Book sections, 'crime' and 'master crime'.

Robot Truck.

Fort

"Right, - I've released the Kraken....um...er....now how do I retrieve the Kraken...?"

"They say you're good with forgeries?"

"I'm sorry, I can't hire you because I can't afford to pay you nine company pensions."

"Well this part of your order has arrived, but the other parts haven't, though I understand they're in transit. So I guess parts of your parts order are partly here."

'Three iron.'

Caution: Sentence Construction Ahead

"You realize that if you eat that, you'll get marketing emails for the rest of your life."

'Looked fine with one head. Besides, two heads are better than one is such a cliche.'

"Design one where the light inside doesn't turn off."

I think it's time we started seeing other people.

"Can we get balloons for mom?"

Blame Joe Manchin for Everything

'We should have thought of using a removalist at migration time a long time ago...'

Man can't figure out what is wrong with his car, not noticing the flat tire.