Mystical Mentors Pillows

the company is cutting back our team's training budget.'

Asking out a palm reader.

Buddhist photo albums,

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

'Insofar as all parties have agreed to mediation, I've taken the liberty of hiring a medium.'

'Don't look upon me as a priest, look upon me as your personal 'After Life Coach.''

'This training session is all about challenging assumptions. For example you see someone looking depressed, dishevelled, unkempt it's easy to jump to conclusions. But they may not be a social worker, they may be a client!'

The Tennis Racket in the Stone

'It started out as meditation, but now it's quiet desperation!'

'You're a water sign and I'm an earth sign. . .Together we're mud.'

"Beware of start-ups with a negative cash flow."

'I see you're not wearing clean underpants.'

Computer literate Monk

"Hear me, for the Lord has given me an exclusive."

'Plant a tree, build a house, father a child and make sure that there is a good lawyer in your closest circle of friends.'

'I just feel so used all the time.'

"You say that life is suffering, but isn't it also complaining?"

Client-centered Therapy.

"He'd torch the castle and I'd rescue the damsel."

'...George isn't in right now, but you can email him at...'

'Understand Briggs, it is not enough to fail - others must succeed.'

Today's presentation - God's Miracles.

"Before we make contact with the departed, be aware that all communications will be recorded and maybe used for training purposes."

God's lil' fix-it shop.

'Your, 'Never can come out in public' session is over. After I leave the room, you come out and slink away!'

Addiction Research Centre.

"How dare you!"

Calendars before Jesus.

"Just keep going for 12 months."

Psychic near sign: Madam Zoe. Palms read futures told weather forcasts given.

"He apologizes for not contacting us during the previous session. The wi-fi was off in the hereafter."

'This is goodbye, Goopta -- I've decided to make a career move to the Scientologists.'

'So where do you see yourself in five years?'

'You'll be having extensive dental surgery...'

The Devil and an angel talk by the water cooler.