Mystical Money-maker Gifts

Will I ever meet a financial advisor who inerstands my needs and likes the same sports teams I do?

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

Time Is Money

Fred wonders if he should go see what's happening in accounting.

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

I was trying to day trade my way through business school, but then the stock market tanked.

Investing your savings

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

"Everything's gone up."

Smiling businessman with rising profits

'Guess who made a bushel today?'

'Can you see the future of my 401(k)?'

Man breaks piggy bank to find another smaller piggy bank inside.

"I was a stockbroker first, but when I realized how much time I spent praying, I figured, what the heck?"

'Wait a minute....!

'Well, maybe upteen zillion was too general a cost estimate.'

"Your portfolio is too conservative."

"This is Fluffy, my pet money."

Woman uses an ATM with buttons for: Grocery, Leverage Buyout, Start Up Capital, Shop Till You Drop.

Snowing Money.

'Guess who made a bushel today?'

"This is Pete, our cryptocurrency expert."

"Really? You'd like to be part of this?"

'Life, liberty & the pursuit of tax shelters.'

'In today's economy, it's important to put some of your money under you mattress and bury some in backyard...'

'Quick...follow that rainbow.'

"There's so much money around now we've started using it as toilet paper."

The Speculators

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

'Stocks rose on news that 'green' - the color of money - is considered environmentally friendly.'

'We've always needed an accounting magician.'

I got the raise

Rogue Traders from Parallel Universes.

Breaking Through

'The big bang theory of creation.'