Mystic Mechanic Appreciator Pillows

"I keep hearing a knocking noise."

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

"Did you have a cat?"

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

'Before we begin, let me see what my fortune cookie says.'

Psychic Car Mechanics.

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

"I'm afraid your wife gets to say 'I told you so.'"

"We don't do that kind of cattle futures, ma'am. You want Madam Mystic down the street."

'Reeta can tell your fortune from your bank statements.'

'Found your problem - there was a hairball in the gasline.'

'They don't make cars like this any more -- the country that built them disappeared.'

Auto Mechanic's Confessional Booth

'The crystal reveals you spend your money foolishly. That will be twenty-five dollars, please.

Greasy toothbrush. One of the downsides to life with the bionic man.

'This time last year you told me that I would meet a tall handsome stranger. Now I need his name and address.'

"Wow. That guy on psychic chat line is really good. He told me our next phone bill would be bigger than usual!"

'No, sorry. You've reached Dragons. Payroll is on extension 4702. Shall I put you through?'

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."

A prediction.

"I'm dating a spiritualist medium..."

"Tell Santa that Rudolph's check engine light is on."

The newspaper that psychics read every morning.

'That's the problem with absolute power, Sire. It corrupts absolutely. And it always seems to start with the fenders and door panels.'

Astral Projecting Babushkas

'You will meet a tall, handsome psychologist who will teat your gullibility.'

"Seducers, politicians and non-believers, it's all become so humdrum. I often wonder, where have all the sorcerers and fortune tellers gone?"

'Oh, well, I had to take it in to get the oil changed anyway.'

'Madam Zora's one of our new schemes to future proof the business!'

Hard-working.