Mystic Business Aficionados T-Shirts

'I've hired Ms. Zebulon as a spiritual advisor to try to raise profits...'

"I've just never worked anyplace where the 'alpha male' was a woman."

'The shareholders have voted you off the board. We don't feel you're tough enough. On the bright side, you've won this year's Miss Congeniality award.'

"Damnit, executive-trainees don't have 'accidents'."

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

Big Shot/Bigger Shot.

'We must grasp this new opportunity'

For the last time, Bobby, I told you – every other person gets the red cup with the placebo. Lemonade 50¢.

'I told you he's gonna be the next Warren Buffett!'

Businessman has Sterling Sign Shaved in Head.

'And all the executive board members got lovely big payouts and lived happily ever after!'

'That's it gentlemen, we're broke. Anybody know any good jokes?'

Welcome to Yellow Pages, Vermont

"They grow up so quickly. It seems like only yesterday that he was in the third grade. Wait, it was yesterday!"

"We'll up your medication and with any luck your delusions should significantly reduce!"

"Can you keep a secret, Fred? The truth is, I've never had a clue what curve it is I'm supposed to stay ahead of!"

'What do you mean by, your people do not want to get in touch with my 'kind' of people?'

Making The World A Better Place for Giant Multinational Corporations

"Helen, is it just the accountant in me, or am I sensing a tone of wistful melancholy and a bittersweet acceptance of the unfathomable mysteries of corporate life in those numbers?"

"We call out to you, please reveal yourself, oh Spirit of Innovation."

"Dear, it's the financial news. Seat belts fastened, seat backs in upright position."

"Get me someone in Apologies, someone in Walkbacks, and send up the whole Scapegoating team."

"Let's talk more about your valuation policy."

'What the hell is a win-win situation?'

Bertha's: A bank that's more than a bank. It's also an insurance broker and a beauty parlor.

'Turn up the air conditioning. Panting always puts us at a disadvantage during negotiations.'

"It's our shareholders... They've lost that lovin' feeling."

"The take over has been completed... they are now working on the sell out."

Snow cones being sold in a snow globe.

'The company is losing millions and the press are asking questions. Gentlemen,we're looking for a scapegoat.'

'Reinvent yourself. You write off the whole thing as a business expense!'

Before The Merger.

'Most loyal employee in my department.'

"How dare you accuse me of running this company into the ground!"

"Retirement will be a pipe dream for many of us...we need to explore new careers for later life."