Mystic About Town Gifts

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

"Did you have a cat?"

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

'Today we will lock the monkey in a room...' 'Why do I volunteer for this?'

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

'Before we begin, let me see what my fortune cookie says.'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

"I see you coming into money, at least 50p for a cup of tea."

"I'm afraid your wife gets to say 'I told you so.'"

Welcome to Atlantis - Watering Ban in Effect.

'Hold it right there, pal! I had a vision that your check is going to bounce, so you can just head right back to your car!'

'No thanks, curiosity has already cost me 7 lives, and I'm not risking any more.'

'Reeta can tell your fortune from your bank statements.'

"I miscounted."

"We don't do that kind of cattle futures, ma'am. You want Madam Mystic down the street."

"You will marry a tall,dark, handsome couple..."

"Medical insurance? Are you kidding? No one will cover me for nine lives!"

'Don't tell anybody, but I'm not wearing a robe.'

"I see a vague figure of someone groping...groping...groping..Yes, yes, it's coming in more clearly now! It seems to be—yes, it is a man! The man has a briefcase! And some papers! The man is an economist!"

"Wow. That guy on psychic chat line is really good. He told me our next phone bill would be bigger than usual!"

Actually, I think you looked better with Atlantis.

'The crystal reveals you spend your money foolishly. That will be twenty-five dollars, please.

"Let's wrap it up. I'm getting a leg cramp."

'This time last year you told me that I would meet a tall handsome stranger. Now I need his name and address.'

"Tuesday is my day off - leave a message..."

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."

'This is where it gets tricky. I see 3 alternate endings and a director's cut.'

"I don't care what your friends say! This "nine lives" business is just an urban legend: think safety first!"

Atlantis Welcomes Careful Divers

A prediction.