Mystic About Town Pillows

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

"Did you have a cat?"

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

'Today we will lock the monkey in a room...' 'Why do I volunteer for this?'

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

'Before we begin, let me see what my fortune cookie says.'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

"I'm afraid your wife gets to say 'I told you so.'"

Welcome to Atlantis - Watering Ban in Effect.

"I see you coming into money, at least 50p for a cup of tea."

'Reeta can tell your fortune from your bank statements.'

"I miscounted."

'No thanks, curiosity has already cost me 7 lives, and I'm not risking any more.'

"We don't do that kind of cattle futures, ma'am. You want Madam Mystic down the street."

"You will marry a tall,dark, handsome couple..."

"Medical insurance? Are you kidding? No one will cover me for nine lives!"

"I see a vague figure of someone groping...groping...groping..Yes, yes, it's coming in more clearly now! It seems to be—yes, it is a man! The man has a briefcase! And some papers! The man is an economist!"

"Let's wrap it up. I'm getting a leg cramp."

'This time last year you told me that I would meet a tall handsome stranger. Now I need his name and address.'

'The crystal reveals you spend your money foolishly. That will be twenty-five dollars, please.

"Wow. That guy on psychic chat line is really good. He told me our next phone bill would be bigger than usual!"

"Tuesday is my day off - leave a message..."

'Don't tell anybody, but I'm not wearing a robe.'

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."

"I don't care what your friends say! This "nine lives" business is just an urban legend: think safety first!"

'This is where it gets tricky. I see 3 alternate endings and a director's cut.'

'You will meet a tall, handsome psychologist who will teat your gullibility.'

"Seducers, politicians and non-believers, it's all become so humdrum. I often wonder, where have all the sorcerers and fortune tellers gone?"

A prediction.