Mystery Junkie Gifts

'No enemies, Miss, could you give men a list of his friends?'

Waking the Dead.

'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'

World Tour.

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

"Eat me"

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

Addicted to Facebook...lost internet connection.

"We used up our planet's energy source and we're here to hijack yours. Where do you keep all your coffee?"

A cross section of the brain shows what a man thinks about.

Off to see the world

"WOW...this new bike has great acceleration!"

"Mail's here."

"I understand the Everest climb used to be quite a chore."

'Geoffrey's kit car can go from nought to upside down in under nine seconds.'

"Why not stay with your mother and me? The Feds will never find you here."

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

'They're showing 'Jaws' on TV tonight: The beaches should be quiet for a few days after that!'

Internet Cafe

'I don't offer any free advice anymore. I am offering a self-help seminar and a motivational coaching program online.'

'We have a positive ID on the spacecraft, Mr. Ferguson. Now, if you can identify the one who abducted you, we won't keep you any longer!'

Help! Trapped on a desert island cartoon...

'I'm going to ask you one more time; who left a hot mug on this table?'

"God, I love this show!"

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."

"Dean Williams, the grant committee approved my research grant to determine how many research grants are a waste of government money!"

'Kids, let's pause and give thanks to that higher power that keeps this family together...our internet service provider.'

Mount Everest.

"Remember me, Mister 'too much bacon is never enough?'"

"Go back to the space station. I forgot my phone."

Roger managed to climb higher than any person had ever climbed before, thanks to sponsorship by Alu-Tech Aluminium Ladders.

"Thank goodness for rear-engine cars!"

'So, were we entertained tonight, or just bludgeoned into submission?'

"Let's park on the other side, just to be on the safe side."

Cannibal: AHHHhh, SEASONED travellers! My FAVOURITE meal!