Mystery Junkie Gifts

'No enemies, Miss, could you give men a list of his friends?'

Waking the Dead.

'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'

World Tour.

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

"Eat me"

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

A cross section of the brain shows what a man thinks about.

Off to see the world

"WOW...this new bike has great acceleration!"

"I understand the Everest climb used to be quite a chore."

'Geoffrey's kit car can go from nought to upside down in under nine seconds.'

"Why not stay with your mother and me? The Feds will never find you here."

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

Internet Cafe

'I don't offer any free advice anymore. I am offering a self-help seminar and a motivational coaching program online.'

"Dean Williams, the grant committee approved my research grant to determine how many research grants are a waste of government money!"

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."

'We have a positive ID on the spacecraft, Mr. Ferguson. Now, if you can identify the one who abducted you, we won't keep you any longer!'

Help! Trapped on a desert island cartoon...

'I'm going to ask you one more time; who left a hot mug on this table?'

'Kids, let's pause and give thanks to that higher power that keeps this family together...our internet service provider.'

"Remember me, Mister 'too much bacon is never enough?'"

Mount Everest.

Cannibal: AHHHhh, SEASONED travellers! My FAVOURITE meal!

"Let's park on the other side, just to be on the safe side."

"Offering free Wi-Fi was genius."

Fair and Balanced Reporting

"Thank goodness for rear-engine cars!"

"Go back to the space station. I forgot my phone."

Roger managed to climb higher than any person had ever climbed before, thanks to sponsorship by Alu-Tech Aluminium Ladders.

Violence on TV.

'So, were we entertained tonight, or just bludgeoned into submission?'