Musical Devil Gifts

"Wow! That's incredible! I mean...how did you know I used to be a white guy?"

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

Double Bass Jumpers.

Guitars in Heaven

By the year 2500, 1 in 10 academics will devote their entire career to divining the meaning of the word 'sussudio'.

"Leave it you guys! We have this EVERY-SINGLE-TIME we go anywhere!!"

A musician bowing a tiny guitar

"Doesn't anybody play the harp anymore?"

'I could have sworn it was the cavalry!!'

"I've decided to be an organ donor."

Today, this humble feature attempts to answer one of the great quandaries of modern times. Is it Louie Louie, oh baby, my hair gotta grow? Wrong! What are the lyrics to the Kingsman's Louie Louie?* *Must be gleaned by listening. No peeking on the internet!

Timpani for the devil

'Maybe next concert we should ease up on the volume.'

'I'm sorry to say that one among you is not pulling his weight... I don't think it's necessary to name names.'

"Isn't it amazing! My horoscope said I was going to meet a tall dark stranger..."

'I take it that when you went on your 'spot reduction' diet, this wasn't what you had in mind?'

Vampire Bassoonist

'I can't play any tunes, it's just used for hiding my farts after dinner.'

'It's clearly the work of the devil. Nevertheless, I see no reason why we can't all share some of the credit.'

Violin Pipe

Sir Paul McCartney warns UK Culture Secretary of live music s bleak future

Dead rock star plays loud music in heaven

HMS Pinafore

"Intern."

'Nice 666 pack.'

Gangster shoots musical notes.

Nobody keeps his personal life to himself anymore phobia. 'Seems like everone's coming out of the closet!'

"Baldo, why is this music so loud?"

What to buy the Devil who has everything?

'That's the last time I go there - Bagpipes and Karaoke just don't mix!'

No, not "tenor." I said he's a "ten-er" --- It's advisable to be ten miles away when he sings.

Nope, not what I thought you meant by "piano bar."

'Oh, how sweet! You're illegally downloading our song!'

"Nothing but Celine Dion CDs. There's your motive, but how do we even begin to narrow down the list of suspects?"

'We're thinking that our Christian rock station here probably isn't a good fit for you. Plus, you keep playing everything backwards.'