Music Store Manager Gifts

'Is this the blues section?'

Beatlemania: Open 24/8

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

"Think of it as buying in – not selling out."

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

Never tell the boss "You can count on me" during inventory.

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

Greatest hits, Greatest Misses.

Guitar pickin'

"You can't find the menswear department? Oh, I'm sorry, Sir- I was standing in front of it."

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

Groovy Baby

"That should read $20.00. I'd make the correction, but I don't want to be accused of price-fixing."

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

SupermarketAwful Market.

Zappo's Air Guitars.

'They're both nice - which can you ill afford least?'

Office Supplies: New and improved motivational posters, now with 25% more inspiration.

Take pity on me. I can't give much this year. What is this heresy, son? I didn't get a raise this year, got furloughed this summer, am behind on my cable bill, can't afford proper dates. But it's the holidays. Think of the needy. Pierre in flat-panels has a new baby. Sandy, the mobile device manager, toils so hard for your business. And don't forget Apple. It's got to make its quarter. Computer Villa. Customer service. I shouldn't just think of myself. That's better. I'd like to upgrade all my d

Self-Checkout.

"Do you have anything by The Damned."

'Gents toilet? Ah, got me there...'

Sports Memorabilia: Help wanted-losers need not apply.

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

"This next song is about narrow-minded record executives and their reluctance to take a chance on anything a bit different."

'I've drawn up a health and safety policy for the company.'

'A word of advice, the squeaky wheel gets the totally organic, 0 trans-fat, soy-based lubricant.'

"Will you only promise the children toys that can be brought at this store?"