Mundane Moments Admirer Pillows

A businessman waits for an elevator; on his briefcase are two stickers reading "Up" and "Down".

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

You're so beautiful, I can't take my eyes off you, even though there's a fly in my soup doing the backstroke, which is comedy gold!

Malfunctioning geyser

"You and your daft inventions."

'Eh...our costume party was last Saturday!'

"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"I always know what Harry's going to say, and he always knows what I'm going to say, so, by and large, we just don't bother."

"If that girl sent over a double cappuccino, maybe you should go talk to her!"

Baldo's How to Be Uncool: No. 5. Forget how hot the coffee is while you're thinking how cool you look sitting in a coffee shop.

As years of unspoken tension surfaced, Trunky refused to raise his hand like a coward.

'I love the way you wiggle your nose when you say that.'

Welcome to our meeting!

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

"The computers are down. You'll just have to suffer and go outside and play."

"Stop arguing - I'll walk myself."

"Do you know why we pulled you over today, sir?"

'Your little one is giving the sitter a big kiss-of life.'

"There's a little jelly or something on your chin."

"Don't stare at his massive claw. . . don't stare at his massive claw. . ."

He couldn't put his finger on it but something told Colin the date wasn't going well.

"Sorry, it’s my first day."

"Recycling has become the high point of my week."

'Hi honey, take me off the speakerphone.'

Mel forgets to zip up his fanny pack before breakdancing.

'They say that six is the new four.'

"Gather 'round and I'll sing in a style that's just earnest enough to make you uncomfortable."

A guy trying his best on a date...

'You rate very high in everything, except, of course, people skills.'

Man getting dressed captures small child in the material,

'Jeremy, you disgusting little pervert!'

"I love our comfortable silences."

'He was so cute! I touched his arm, and guess what? He said, 'Jeepers, Creepers'!'

"On Monday, they will introduce a new office layout and you'll be near Judy, who isn't good at sharing her charger. Then you'll finish up a report on whether your client's edgy new marketing tactics have been resonating with the 18-34 demographic. The results will be inconclusive and your boss will say, 'Jared, there'll always be another Instagram-based influence strategy to review,' but she also takes a while to approve your annual leave request and you will suspect that the two are related."