Muhammad Ali Fans Pillows

"Look! I got this gold candy medallion at the opening of the ALi center! Muhammad Ali is my hero!" "Then you should chuck that medallion in the Ohio river and burn a draft card, Junior!"

Easter Island Cheeseheads

Imported Candy. "Chocolate Australian Bears"? Yes --- "Coca-Koalas"!

Prepare yourself, America. Dancing with the Stars is poised to present a new 12-week competition. And you'll never guess who's dancing now! Listen to the passion and fight in our newest celebrity dancer

"I spy with my little eye..." "The ocean! It's always the ocean!"

"He quit online counseling. This gives him the same sympathy, but cheaper."

Dispute between Pelosi and Trump

'Scrub that previous message Houston. There is no, I repeat no intelligent life on Mars.'

'I have nothing to declare... Okay, I liked Maui better.'

"Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs would make a great reality show."

'You don't know how much it would mean to me if you could just jump.'

RETURN BOOKS HERE, 'I'm sorry, sir -- all our books on Houdini have disappeared.'

Man sees capitol building: 'Truth, Justice, Reality TV'

'...Nadine Dorries has sent you a present from Australia. She said as soon as she saw it she thought of you!'

After finishing his two year residency at Drai's Beach club, in Las Vegas, D.J. Pauly D decides to return to his first love theatre.

Election Report. The political debates and huge ratings. "Dancing Around the Issues" topped "Dancing with the Stars"!

"Gosh, it's hot in Roswell!"

Remote control car breakdown.

As Seen On TV

Easter bunny Island.

'OK, you've got your problems. Now, you can keep them and walk away - or trade them with whoever's behind door number one, two or three.'

Michael Grade is right...ITV needs more real writers which is why we want you to commission 'celebrity novelists get me out of here'.

"I'd like a portrait of me in the style of him."

'We were matched by computer.'

'We need more cake shows!'

'Take us to your - y'know whasisname - that chap who came runner up in 'Pop Idol''

Continental marshal

"Do I have to pay the plaintiff the same amount again for each rerun of my case on TV?"

'So, the Father is a native of Easter Island?'

"I knew you was mad when you tried to sell me to them "American Pickers" fellers."

The Party of Lincoln

New from NBC: 'World's Biggest Feline Loser.'

'It's a new reality show call 'Detoxing with the Stars'...'

"Would you please come with us, Sir?!"

'Seriously, your ululation is good enough for American Idol.'