Muddy Ruffian Gifts

'I'm not making a mess, Mom -- I'm becoming one with the Earth!'

Glastonbury. After.

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

'I'd love to play house, Kevin, but I've got a business to run.'

'Let's run it through legal.'

'Parents are so inconsistent. They spend all day avoiding soil loss and all night promoting it.'

Wedding Wellies

Unnatural Selection.

'How do I know your ours?'

Down On the Farm

'Was that yours Clarrie, or one of mine?'

'It needs more dirt.'

Begin by removing all surplus mud.

Wipe Your Feet

'Shakin' bacon.'

'I found a whole bunch of worms in the wheel wells!'

"I've done my tour of duty on Wall Street."

"I don't object to their right to roam, I just wish they would wipe their feet."

'I'm running into lots of trouble with my ambition to be a shock jock.'

"No! Don't jump in that muddy puddle! You haven't got your best clothes on!"

"If you want soil moved around, I say why wait for erosion."

'...and you can take that wag off your tail!'

'Nasty, right to the end!'

Rugby was the winner on the day!

"They were not the tastiest mints the swine had eaten, but they kept casting them before him, so he kept on eating them."

Footbath sign.

'I came back from the music festival half deaf, it turned out to be mud in my ears.'

'Identify yourself - are you one of mine?'

'Hey, Mom! -- You want to hear a dirty story?'

'The muck stops here!'

'The mudguards don't work.'