Movie Snarker Pillows

'When my business turned into a lemon, I made lemonade....but that also failed when nobody liked its taste'

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

'Which channel would you like to tut at tonight?'

"Well, you can't say they didn't warn us."

'I hate to tell you... it's not 'amber waves of gain'.'

"Get those things away from me- I can't stop eating them."

"'Superman legacy' was awful. Just awful!"

'Don't take it personally... he doesn't know I'm here either.'

"I think I'll just leave a hate tip."

'Waiter, this salad is obnoxious!' 'But, sir — you asked for French dressing!'

'This is quite common. You've eaten so many sausages that you've turned into one.'

'It's just a few things your concession stand doesn't carry - fried chicken, potato salad, pumpkin pie...'

'Don't kid yourself. If you're too ugly to be cooked, they'll grind you up into one of those fish protein concentrates.'

"My compliments to yhe liquidator - that was terrible."

Cull people who eat big bags of potato chips during a movie.

'Are you genetically modified? - Then you'll love our G.M. food.'

"I don't care if it is the best value... next time we're just getting a MEDIUM popcorn!"

"How to Look, Feel & Sound like Shit"

'Well I think we've nearly broken the back of this 'risk assessment'.'

"My compliments to your chefs - their broth was disgusting."

'Maybe I give off a little ammonia, but at least I don't smell like people!'

"I just don't have it in me today..." "Well, aren't you the lucky one."

"The Breakfast of Politicians. Low in character and moral fiber."

"I really prefer the place across the street. The cockroaches are smaller."

'These childproof vials! I CAN'T GET MY TRANQUILIZERS OPEN!!'