Movie Industry Insider T-Shirts

"..And the best product placement in a film award goes to..."

'California is so show-biz! - First we elect an evil robot from the future, and then we replace him with a crazy zombie from the past.'

"What you ain't - is A GENT!"

Working in the Hazard Zone!

'Hey, Charlie, have we got good news for you!'

Enterpe, Terpsichore, Calliope, and Bernie, their agent.

"I love being your agent, Nick, but the guys making the really big bucks now are the managers. Let me be your manager."

'And the Award goes to...Ewww...him?'

"Once again, the epicenter seems to be Christian Slater."

Death Styles of the Rich and Famous

"It's been done, but I don't think it's been redone."

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

'See, I told you - nobody's job is safe!'

"If small stars keep planets in line, what do big stars do?"

When stars marry: 'Why did you ask him first? Does he have top billing?'

'And who are you wearing?'

"You know that kid that submitted a screenplay to us on the back of a restaurant menu? I'm passing on it. I like the screenplay, but I hate that restaurant."

This next number is when we smash our guitars...

"I'm not sure if the audience is ready to embrace you in a romantic comedy."

"When did movies start being dumb all year round?"

"Wait a minute... You're not Warren Gurkenman the famous actor, but his stuntman?!"

"It's always 'Get me a Godzilla type,' never 'Get me Godzilla!'"

Distancing with the Stars

'Anthony Hopkins will be offered the role of Saddam Hussein in a new Jessica Lynch movie.'

Showbiz

"Listen, I'm speaking to you not just as your agent, but also as a parasite."

"First, I storyboarded it."

Obscene Hollywood phone call

"All right, everybody- time to knock off for lunch."