Mountain Scaler T-Shirts

"A Clif Bar wrapper? That's why you dragged me up here?!"

The Evolution of the Bonus

Career opportunities

Critisize your weight.

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

"Yes, if that towel weighs 25 lbs that would explain the reading."

"I don’t care that muscle weighs more than fat. I only know I work out here and gain 5 pounds!"

'You have to admit Darling that there's an awesome view from our eyrie...'

"And someday, when you're a little further up the corporate ladder, maybe we'll let you meet J.R. himself!"

'On behalf of the park I'm going to have to charge you an artist's modeling fee.'

Salesman on Holiday

Woman and sport trainer

'Magnificent, not a soul in sight--just like the floor of the NYSE.'

'To make matter worse, our combined weight is higher than our credit score.'

'When it comes to skiing, Edwin doesn't seem to know the word 'patience'.'

"It's a dog eat dog world, Finkstrom."

'There must be more to life than this.'

'I think it's having a core melt down!'

"Wait a minute - Where's the fire escape?"

'Whaddya mean the scale keeps flashing tilt?'

'Walter, are you avoiding me?'

"Yes, it's big, but we've got bigger mountains to climb!"

Library section 'Mountain climbing' with lady climbing up to it.

Climbing the Wall.

'Above the... Above the... Hmm... Above the what?'

"I don't think it matters is you choose metric or imperial."

'People who get up on the wrong side of the bed shouldn't live in high-rises.'

"I must not eat pies off the path, I must not eat pies off the path..."

I want you to assess your own abilities on a scale of one to ten, - 'Okay,' - 'Intelligence,' - 'Five,' - 'Confidence' - 'Five,' - 'Social Skills' - 'Five,' - 'Why do you think you've rated them all as five' - 'I forgot to ask if ten was good or bad,'

'Never Anything on TV...'

'Excuse me -- did you happen to noticed which mountain I fell off of?'

'You weigh 14 pints.'

"Honey, look! You can see Vermont's annoying social-liberalist frugality from here!"

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"