Motoring Gifts

Steep learning curve ahead.

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

Insensitive driving school - 'That was crap.'

'Obese Children' road sign outside school

'Well thank God...I thought for one minute you were a kissogram.'

Bob continued to yell at other drivers long after he arrived home.

'Don't tell me to watch my language! You give me this sort of quote, I'll give you this sort of quote!'

'This one has a tiny amount of unleaded petrol in it.'

'Panic stations! Parking dilemma!'

'I want my money back -- I'm still a wuss.'

'It gets me from A to B alright but it won't get me from B back to A!!'

'Now do you believe me about every other driver on the road.'

No child onboard. Don't drive carefully.

'I find wealth impresses the Ladies. Try this it smells of Petrol.'

'Sorry I'm late. My van broke down and I didn't know how to fix it.'

'Not only the first wheel, the first road accident as well!'

'We're not actually going that fast- it's just that the ink got smudged.'

Teds Autos - Never knowingly undersealed.

'The only parts that don't need replacing are the 'fluffy dice'.'

M25 traffic goes one way - 'The new scheme is almost flawless, we've just got to work out how to make the buggers turnaround.'

Rallying meets the environmental challenge

"According to this map, I don't have a clue where we are."

'I couldn't fix the brakes, so I made your horn louder.'

Give way - 'Oh, alright then...'

Because of the hike in fuel prices, several road users have returned to steam powered vehicles.

"Look, it definitely says on the sign that we're over there."

'You could at least have had the decency of waiting until I'd moved off!'

Car towing a caravan and a greenhouse.

An Autobahn with an automatic transmission control

'Congratulations. You've passed.'

'Judging by this job you should be called a 'Muckanic'!'

Basketball net above the garage door.

Left-hand drive - A left hand with a car steering wheel and console on it.

Three long vehicles.

Skyrocketing Gas.