Motoring Gifts

Steep learning curve ahead.

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

Insensitive driving school - 'That was crap.'

'Obese Children' road sign outside school

Bob continued to yell at other drivers long after he arrived home.

'Well thank God...I thought for one minute you were a kissogram.'

'Don't tell me to watch my language! You give me this sort of quote, I'll give you this sort of quote!'

Road - Slippery When Wet.

'Whoah, look! Jed's got new wheels!'

'This one has a tiny amount of unleaded petrol in it.'

'Panic stations! Parking dilemma!'

'It gets me from A to B alright but it won't get me from B back to A!!'

'I find wealth impresses the Ladies. Try this it smells of Petrol.'

'Now do you believe me about every other driver on the road.'

'Sorry I'm late. My van broke down and I didn't know how to fix it.'

'Not only the first wheel, the first road accident as well!'

'I want my money back -- I'm still a wuss.'

No child onboard. Don't drive carefully.

'We're not actually going that fast- it's just that the ink got smudged.'

Teds Autos - Never knowingly undersealed.

'The only parts that don't need replacing are the 'fluffy dice'.'

M25 traffic goes one way - 'The new scheme is almost flawless, we've just got to work out how to make the buggers turnaround.'

Rallying meets the environmental challenge

"According to this map, I don't have a clue where we are."

'I couldn't fix the brakes, so I made your horn louder.'

"This car sharing scheme is great, I'II try to get it back to you in a month or so."

Man, with his protective shell...

"Look, it definitely says on the sign that we're over there."

Because of the hike in fuel prices, several road users have returned to steam powered vehicles.

'If I were you, I'd keep the oil and change the car.'

Give way - 'Oh, alright then...'

'You could at least have had the decency of waiting until I'd moved off!'

Car towing a caravan and a greenhouse.

An Autobahn with an automatic transmission control

'Congratulations. You've passed.'