Motivationally Challenged Gifts

"Why don't you take up a sport,son-like long distance running-away from home...?"

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

Eldrow

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

Prawn Amend

Book store has a book called 'Mind Games,' which is floating magically in the air.

'I guess it was a mistake to make them self-starting.'

It's difficult to swim the channel without the benefit of convincing inspiration.

"I can’t even find the motivation to quit my gym membership."

'Isn't it how you learnt to swim?'

'Don't give up the day job...'

Motivation Coach

'...and our work environment offers..well...wonderful horror stories to tell your grandkids.'

"Dear diary, what the heck did you do with my car keys?!"

"I'm pretty sure the definition leadership is the use of anger to motivate those who are already miserable."

"I misplace everything, yet there always seems to be more of it."

Your IQ is 176, Peel. - 'Is that high?' - 'That's higher than Stephen Hawking.' - 'Wow!' - 'Maybe you'll be a great physicist one day.' - 'Will I shrivel, too?' -

"I consider myself to be a counterproductive member of society."

'I'm glad you're enthusiastic and energized by the Monday morning meeting...but you've got to be more of a team player.'

Following through!

Traditional Management Style.

'He's just messing with your mind.'

Reasons to avoid training no.236 - A leaf on the path.

'I like you, Abigail, but I'm feeling too much pressure in this relationship!'

"At least you're not afraid to fail."

"You are a very special person with a hangover!"

"My room was clean last week, it's not my fault you missed it."

"A banana Grace left in my room four weeks ago."

"It doesn't matter how small you start...."

"...anyway, that's enough about me...in next week's session we'll talk about something else."

A man walks on a treadmill on hot coals.

"He finds it difficult to get in touch with his emotions."

"I didn't know how to complete a crossword until I filled in all the blanks..."

Office Diaries

'I'm Zorro Borinsky, the new company motivation coach! This sign means 'Lazybones, no bonus'!'