"You ever wonder why they always draw only one tree?"
Motif Critic Mugs
Start the day with a splash of wit—our creative critic mugs make brilliant gifts, blending humor with artistic flair to celebrate their love for analysis and critique.
No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal
"Maybe I don't like stunning debuts."
Da Vinci painting a grumpy version of Mona Lisa.
"I'm working on more of a 'personal' mythology."
"Call me 'pops' one more time and I'll lace 'ya one!"
"She bathes him. She feeds him. She burps him. Mother's a real micromanager."
"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."
"Don't forget to rate us on stable-BnB."
'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'
"Don't these fools realize they're violating every principle of feng-shui?"
Down With Wikipedia
"We encourage Theo to challenge clichés and mediocrity."
This picture of me in the annual report...do you think it really captures the true inner corporate man?
"Please excuse our appearance while our records are being impounded."
'To much orange.'
"The school construction budget is so small we can't even afford to build a snowman."
"AI designed my statue."
"Coming up... more of the same mindless pop songs with repetitive lyrics and nauseating melodies!"
Pop up begger.
"First the open floor plan, now this."
Right now my brother Al is paying a psychiatrist a hundred bucks an hour to hear his troubles, while I'm drinking beer and telling you mine at happy hour prices. Obviously, Al IS the crazy one.
"Would it have killed him to create a screened-in porch?!"
"Do I take it that we can't be guaranteed your vote in the forthcoming election?"
'Is it me or do these new led street lights wash out the reds and yellows?'
'I should know who he is! His work is in every gallery I go into.'
"Excuse me - could you tell me which recession we are in at the moment?"
"Have you noticed how blatant sex is everywhere in the culture but here?"
London Congestion & Polution Zone - 'What's your problem? I thought Boris was in charge now.'
'It just seem excessive, somehow -- buying a big-screen, high-definition TV to watch Geraldo with.'
Pfft! I could do that.
Pillaging For Mom
"It's off-white, but a little too off. It may get very tiring. What do you think?"
"A brand new one will cost you $18. If I repair it the cost would be $397."
'WHO is the architect here?'
Motif Critic Mugs Collection
Motif Critic Pillows
Discover pillows that bring humor and personality to their space, celebrating the creative critic’s eye for detail.
Motif Critic Prints
Browse prints that showcase their passion for art and critique—thoughtful pieces that inspire and amuse.
Motif Critic T-Shirts
Find t-shirts that speak to their love of critique and creativity—ideal for the stylish, witty reviewer in your life.