Mortgage Magician T-Shirts

'Ready?!'

'Forget my mortgage application, fill this bag with money. I've decided to make a cash offer!'

'Well I think everything is in order. Congratulations on your new home!'

"For financial reasons we're selling this brick and mortar home and becoming an online family."

First Time Liars.

'...And then, my balloon mortgage popped!'

'If you feed that thing, it'll NEVER go away!'

"I know I don't have a credit history. I had my name legally changed after that mortgage fiasco."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

Time Is Money

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

Fred wonders if he should go see what's happening in accounting.

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

"Ed and Helen's portfolio rose 3 point today on Dave's purchase of 100 shares..."

I was trying to day trade my way through business school, but then the stock market tanked.

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% budget allocation."

Investing your savings

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

"Everything's gone up."

'This wasn't what I meant by viral marketing...but if you can get it to work.'

Smiling businessman with rising profits

'It WAS rather unkind of you to hide his bottle-opener, Mrs Jones.'

'Guess who made a bushel today?'

Falling stocks appear to be rising when man stands on his head.

Man breaks piggy bank to find another smaller piggy bank inside.

'Wait a minute....!

"For my next trick, I shall turn four consecutive quarters of losses into a positive outlook going forward."

"I said, 'You must be waiting for 'Mr. Right,' too.'"

"These are magic beans, my boy. Their value comes from growth and scale, not revenue."

'Well, maybe upteen zillion was too general a cost estimate.'

"Your portfolio is too conservative."

"This is Fluffy, my pet money."

Woman uses an ATM with buttons for: Grocery, Leverage Buyout, Start Up Capital, Shop Till You Drop.