Morning Routine Guru Gifts

'This is an up and coming area. You may wish to shave before you buy the paper in future.'

'That was fun!'

Back to work...

Future garbage truck driver.

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

"My favorite way to start the day...coffee, danish, and a data dump."

Bird Tweet.

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

When Shakespeare gets up early, on the wrong side of the bed of a stranger, and in a clown suit... Later that same day, he will commence work on 'The Comedy of Errors.'"

Fear of news.

'Ahhhh?I love the smell of a staff meeting in the morning!'

Tired Barbie

"Great coffee, Carole."

'...and I only have eyes, for ewe...'

Have you got your make up on yet?

Alarmistclock

French Early Bird

'Everything is automatic. The coffee turns on at 7:00...They go to work at 7:25 and we go up and get in their bed.'

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

1,572 Performances.

"Lemme guess: You're struggling with the French press again."

Business man sees himself as a shark

So Far So Good

"Hold on... did you mean to hit Snooze or Jazz?"

'So how do you manage such a close shave?' 'Simple,i wait till the very last second.'

A barbarian warrior eats his breakfast

"Mirror, mirror on the wall ... what the heck is up with my hair?"

Waking Up With Rooster.

Employee attending a breakfast meeting in his pyjamas.

"I AM following doctor's orders. He told me to cut back to one cup a day...right?!"

'He left for the office in a bit of a temper!'

"These songbirds every morning at five A.M. would be really annoying if they weren't so damn talented."

"Are those my slippers?!"