Morning Routine Gifts

Instant human... just add coffee

'It's my sinuses, Doctor - I wake up but I don't smell the coffee.'

The Rise of Man

The shock of recognition.

'I'm still waking up OK, but recently I haven't been smelling the coffee.'

A cup of coffee is paired with an injection needle and a lighter.

"OK, now here comes the lava."

"Morning Gorgeous!"

To Do: 1) Wake up 2) Smell coffee.

"Why can't you hide behind a newspaper at breakfast like any normal man?"

Early Morning Roll Call.

'Good Morning!'

Spilled coffee

'Never, Ever...make the mistake of setting your alarm for 3:00 a.m. if you intend to get up at 7:00 a.m.'

"Well, actually, the early birds get the early-rising, older worms! Personally, I prefer the juicier teenage worms who don't usually rise until mid to late morning..."

"Good! I see they made the coffee nice and strong this morning."

'I don't think there actually is a right side of the bed for you to wake up on, Dear!'

Bad Hair Day

Tea and a pipe

'Never, Ever...drink that fourth cup of coffee in the morning.'

'He left for the office in a bit of a temper!'

"Why do you go to bed so late?"

"Whew!. . . Worm breath!"

'I like to start my day with a cup of Joe.'

"Well, what's it gonna be today? Do I curse the darkness or light a candle."

"It's now 6:02am! Breakfast is two minutes late! We've been patient enough: let's wake them up!"

Have you got your make up on yet?

'I'm detecting a distinct single origin bean from a family farm in the southern region of Costa Rica with a nut-to-chocolate roasty note.'

Morning Genie

Office workers describing their mornings

'Separate bedrooms aren't enough -- we need separate breakfast nooks.'

' 'cock-a-doodle-doo' out of whack!'

Judges alarm clock: 'beep beep, all rise!'

"I'll say no to the kiss this morning, Agnus, you haven't shaved yet."

"Master Bat-Guy, it's time to wake up."