Morning Grumbler Pillows

"OK, now here comes the lava."

Contact Sport Lens.

'To be perfectly honest, I hate my job: I'm not really a morning person...'

'I hate Monday morning commutes!'

"Teaching's a joy until the first bell. Then the whole day's ruined."

'Irritable bowl syndrome'

Man - 'This coffee tastes like mud!' Woman - 'It was ground this morning.'

The beginning of. . . one of those days.

Ann Coulter starts her day...

The beginning of one of those days.

'Mum! Mum!... My egg's gone all runny!'

Inside-of-Body-Experience

"The sooner they take you off vice patrols the better."

"Where's the snooze button on this thing?" "Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!"

"Whoever invented the obituary page is a real jerk."

"The planet is all wobbly this morning."

The Cat's Alarm Clock

"Now I've done it. I burned the toast AND the flag."

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

'Can I help it if she's a rotten teacher?'

Boring and unnecessary meetings

'Quicker to cycle anyway, mate...'

"We saw some inspired lunacy, then had some uninspired Italian."

"Yes, you should have studied harder and no, you can't unsubscribe from 5th grade."

"Tuesday mornings don't get enough respect. They should be hated just as much as Monday mornings."

'I got a darn D-plus, and that's WITH cheating!'

Can you tell me how to sue you for flunking me out of law school?

"This test wasn't fair! No way it's an accurate measure of what I know!"

'Why does the phone always have to ring when I'm out of the bath?!'

Le Bolshie Chef.

'Well I see we both got our ugly sleep.'

'You've come at a bad time. He's in but he hasn't had his muffin and coffee yet.'

I don't like mondays

'This food is revolting. And such small portions.'