Morning Grumblers Pillows

The mirror knew when to keep quiet. Bob hated face-to-face confrontations first thing in the morning.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"Well, I'm thinking about boarding school. Though I'm not sure they accept adults."

Back to work...

Broken Alarm Clock.

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

The Cat's Alarm Clock

"How about a little more coffee?"

You have the worst spring breath.

"I know it's tough to get motivated on Mondays, but..."

"It's another day, Phil. Planning to suit up?"

'Misery is sleeping in late on Saturday morning then realizing it's only Wednesday...'

I am coffee and I need more coffee

Buzz. Go away. Buzz buzz. I'm up! The alarm clock always wants it more than you do.

'This may be the only time I'll ever bring you breakfast in bed - So wake up!'

"I much prefer the evening milking to the morning one: The farmer is not a "morning person", now is he?"

'Gravity wins - again.'

'Bonny, I've forgotten...What time is that 9 o'clock meeting tomorrow?...'

"The planet is all wobbly this morning."

'If you get one who refuses to wake up, pour it in his lap.'

'Sorry I'm late - My sundial didn't go off.'

The morning show for people who HATE mornings

"Here! Drink your coffee... Honestly, you can be such a bear in the morning!"

I'm going to hate myself in the morning, but I hate everything in the morning.

"Dang it."

"Uggh! Who am I?" 'Rory Bremner wakes up with a hangover'

Alarm clock.

"Don't rush me! I won't be much of a busy bee if I don't get my second cup of coffee."

Time stood still – which made it an easy target.

'Was the class too early for you?'

'It's a true real scientific fact! If I don't open my eyes, today will go away!'

"It's someone's turn to make the coffee..."

"And a 'good morning' to you, too"

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'